oh well, just decided to delete the entry i posted today evening. And repost another entry now. At 10.30pm.

Sunday is here once again and very soon it will be another week gone.
Today, i was a fierce woman and i made 3 people cry.. I scolded my sis and 2 of my students who were at my house. All of them didn't finish my homework!

Students nowadays are so horrible. They drive their teacher to the wall. And although i scolded them for their own good, seeing them cry, my heart was feeling sorry for what i did. Nevertheless, i knew i had to do it. I want them to improve.

1) my sister. She told me she left only a piece of my homework undone and would get it done very quickly after she returned from her escape theme park. But, she lied. she has so much work undone. And, the big thing is that she is my sister! She knows all along i hated people who lie and of all people, she lied to me in order to go to escape theme park. So, i didn't allow her to go. She then bang e door of my room and did her work inside with her mp3 on. Not hesitating, i confiscated her mp3. How can she multi-task!! She has sooo much careless mistakes in her Math and eng grammer!

2) Li shan, my pri 4 student. She almost killed me. Her foundation is barely there and if i have magic powder, i would gladly and kindly give it to her, to make her cleverer and be less lazy! Her spelling sentence was "the dog barked at the terrified girl" and she wrote"the bog baked the terrified girl" AHHHhh!! when i see this, i almost fainted.

3) Lester, my pri 3 student. He didn't complete the chinese writings that my mum gave him, he failed his chinese 听写 and the marks were 4/21. This 21 words were the same old words that my mum gave him 3 weeks ago and until now, he still cannot learn it well. He had his deserved punishments from my mum, then punishment from me. He took 2 hrs plus and still couldn't get his 6, 7, 8 timestable into his head. This is the 3rd week that i'm repeating this and argh. i really cannot accept that cos i know he is a bright student BUT just plain lazy.

All these students were in my house from 12-6pm. Long hours yet nothing much completed.
Am i a bad teacher or are students nowadays mutating to stubborn monsters who doesn't want to study? i knew i wasn't like this when young. neither were my brothers like that. But why is it that children now become like that?

They should be appreciative of their lifestyle as a student and has no other worries unlike people of my age or even older. I used to want to grow up but as you grow, responsibility is something you have to shoulder. Freedom of choice is not given and you just have to accept the fact responsibility goes with age. Undeniably, i still have my own childish-ness in me. I like to cuddle beside my mum and request her to give me a hug when i feel lousy. I like to kick my sister's butt, tease her and even disturb her when she sleeps.

But well well, all these things have lessen.

Now, i use sleep to ease my uneasy heart and mind. I use food to distract me from what i'm facing.
I worry and fear alot, but i don't say nor show.
I want my mum to hug me, but i no longer ask.
I want to cry at times, but i tell myself i have to be strong.
I want to be happy, but i no longer smile genuinely.
Sigh. Why is life a complex mixture?
Although i know life goes on no matter what we face, happiness seems to be lacking in some where or another..

Sigh.


i feel like going for a jog right now..

Holding onto time.. i made the wish..