A long day i've had.
Finally had the time to sit down now and blog. Saturday was very tiring and i still went for midnight movie and supper with Sherman after postponing back several times.
Today is Easter sunday and i went church despite the bad headache. Actually, I should have gone on good friday but i didn't. I know alot of them have been putting in alot of effort in this whole planning and i'm really sorry i couldn't make it. i really tried. But no excuses. I should prioritise my time better. But then again, i'm sorry.

For the past few days, the hormones in me make me feel really high but today, it plunges down. Suddenly and uncontrollably.
i think i feel like a loser. Have tried hard to mask that worry and all. but as today proceeds, the feeling hits me stronger. The evoking emotions made me erupted into tears of helplessness when finally when i went home and see that my sister and 2 students were such a disappointment. i didn't even bother to scold this time. I got myself changed and then walked out of the house again. My mother will do the rest.
Scolding, i guess i cannot do it today. There is too much in my mind. Everything escalated to the point of saturation.

At the baptising ceremony, i'm truely convinced of some feelings someone had. That troubled face of that somebody made me see the seriousness of his injury and I'm really worried for him. But yet, I couldn't help in any ways when a friend is really in need. I couldn't even joke to cheer him up cos when i see him, all i want to ask or could say was "Are you ok? is your heals better?" That's all. And i think it is so useless. First, he will say he is fine and that's like so convincing. Second, he will say his heals is better but better doesn't mean totally recovered.

Although i've helped to find the best orthopedic in Mount E for him, i hope there will be no need for him to seek consultation from him. It's really expensive and sigh, tomorrow he is going to risk it and go for another perilous obstacle course plus the 16km route march. I'm against it but since he is so persistent, Dear lord, please watch over him and protect him in everyway. yes, everyway and everything he does. Be merciful towards them lord, show them your wonderful and magnanimous love and allow them to tide through all hurdles till the day they commission.



sigh.